Tag Archives: sex-positive

The Paradox of Sexual Silence

I am continually surprised by how many people do not talk about sex with their partner/s.

But then again, it’s really not surprising given that communication around sex is not encouraged in our culture. In fact, it could be argued that we are actively taught not to talk about sex – just think of all the movie sex scenes where everything happens in complete silence (minus the passionate music) and talking during sex is represented as an awkward interruption to the moment.

As a consequence, many people have never learnt how to discuss sex comfortably and constructively. Many people feel quite uncomfortable even thinking about talking about sex. Continue reading The Paradox of Sexual Silence

Inclusive Sex Education for Kiddies

After my last post about Fear of Sex Education, I had some great replies on Facebook suggesting a diversity friendly kids book called What makes a Baby.

Unlike traditional books about baby-makin’ (which focus on a mumma and a dadda and… that’s about it), this books looks at all kinds of ways to make babies like using donor gametes (sperm, eggs, embryos) and surrogacy arrangements.

“What makes it new is that its a book about where babies come from that actually works for every kind of family and every kind of kid.” Continue reading Inclusive Sex Education for Kiddies

Important Ingredients : Laughter

Last night I gave a talk on sexuality to a prostate cancer support group. After prostate cancer treatment, many men and couples struggle with changes in erectile function, as well as other changes that can impact sexuality like low mood, stress, lack of ejaculation, existential crisis, incontinence and side effects of medications.

My talk was about non-medical ways to foster enjoyable sexual experiences. And with a crowd all at least 30 years my senior, I wasn’t quite sure how they would respond to my no holds barred approach to talking about sex.

But to my great joy, this group was full of comedy. Continue reading Important Ingredients : Laughter

My Sex-Positive Compass

Sex therapy has been around a long time in many different shapes and forms, and each therapist has their own style and focus that works for them and their clients. As I was having some reflection time this week, I began to think about what concepts and ideas I find most helpful as a compass in my work.

Whilst I belief many different theories and strategies are helpful, these five main ideas are what guide my practice: Continue reading My Sex-Positive Compass