As I was wondering around the fertility clinic I work at today, I noticed a copy of Sex at 6pm, by Annarosa Berman. I’ve heard of this book many times but have never read it.
As I was flipping through the pages I found an excerpt that stood out to me, about a couple rushing home to have sex by 6pm in their desperate efforts to conceive.
I get home at 5:55pm, tell the taxi driver to keep the change and run up the stairs. In the bedroom, Charles, in his silk dressing gown, is reclining on the bed. He has arranged white lilies in a vase and poured red wine in crystal glasses.
‘That egg is doing the tango inside you,’ he informs me. ‘It’s saying: “Come and get me Baby. I’ve just escaped from my follicle.”’
‘Shall we send in a dancing partner then?’
I giggle every time I read this. And what stood out for me in these lines was this couple’s attempts to bring romance, love and humour to this very difficult and pressured situation.
The function of sex is radically changed as a couple struggles with infertility and assisted reproduction, and it can be very hard to maintain some kind of normalcy and passion in their relationship.
But humans are also a resilient bunch, and this conversation demonstrates how people can be creative and resilient against the forces that charge to dampen their intimacy.
Dr. Alice Hucker
Clinical Psychologist & Sex Therapist