Undergoing gynaecological exams (such as cervical screening or fertility related procedures) is commonly somewhat uncomfortable.
It’s normal to feel some awkwardness or nervousness before and/or during these intimate exams. Fair enough – these are necessary but invasive procedures. And sometimes with a complete stranger.
It is also common to feel some physical discomfort – the equipment may be cold and hard, you may be feeling tense and find it hard to relax your pelvic muscles, a swab may poke in a sensitive spot.
For some people though, gynaecological procedures are very uncomfortable, painful and distressing. Pelvic pain can impact in a variety of ways and may be caused by a variety of factors. These include: Continue reading Painful Gyne Exams: First Steps to Good Care
Eroticism can be defined in many ways. Here are a few definitions that I like:
- a quality (in a person, artwork, fantasy, etc.) that causes sexual feelings;
- a philosophical contemplation concerning the aesthetics of sexual desire, sensuality and romantic love;
- a state of sexual arousal or anticipation – an insistent sexual impulse, desire, or pattern of thoughts;
- the cultivation of pleasure for its own sake;
- the exploration of sexual imagination and fantasies.
Continue reading Curating Your Erotic Diet
Satisfying sex is not a given in all relationships, and there are certain factors that can predict a more positive and sustainable sex life.
If enough of the conditions for enjoyable sex are met and prioritised, it is much easier to manage desire discrepancies, to add novelty into your sex life, and to remain open and receptive to sexual experiences over a long-term relationship.
These factors can be grouped into 3 main categories: Healthy Body & Mind; Healthy Relationship; and Sexy Sex. Realistic Expectations are also needed. Continue reading Conditions for Good Sex
Part 1 of this blog series described three common kinds of “low sexual desire” concerns.
Whilst different kinds of sexual desire concerns need to be approached in different ways, there are several ideas that can be helpful in all scenarios. And this is what I will cover here in Part 2.
The four key ideas covered here are: Understanding spontaneous and receptive sexual desire, knowing the value of sex in your life, using communication to negotiate a satisfying sex life, and exploring the conditions for good sex. Continue reading What is Low Sexual Desire? Part 2.
I was listening to Sunday Night Safran this morning and during one of the segment breaks, John Safran and Father Bob McGuire were discussing the use of phones during sex. Except Father Bob didn’t want to say “sex” on national radio, so they described it as “checking tweets” during a “near death experience” – very cute Father Bob.
This isn’t the first time I had heard about this, but I thought it was time to look into these reports in a bit more depth. Continue reading Checking Tweets During Sex…Oh Dear…
For a general introduction to mindfulness and how it relates to sexuality see Mindful Sex: Tuning In, Turning On
One common misperception of mindfulness or meditation is that the goal is to “clear your mind”. Therefore, many people tell me “I’ve tried meditation before, and it didn’t work for me. My mind just races too much.”
Well, their mind is doing exactly what is was designed to do – to think, to ruminate, to worry, to analyse – because all of these mind activities have survival benefits to humans.
When humans emerged tens of thousands of years ago, the landscape was very different to how we live now. Continue reading Creating Mindful Moments